tell me WHY
by thewayofkris
Summary: songfic/dedication; -- sometimes, you just have to let go.


**For Peyton :)**

* * *

_I took a chance, I took a shot  
and you might think I'm bulletproof, but I'm not  
you took a swing, I took it hard  
and down here from the ground I see who you are_

I gave Nate a shot. It was amazing. For the first couple of months that is. I also gave him a chance. Oh, I wish you knew how much I regret it now. He might have thought that I was unbreakable. That nothing could ever shame me. Boy was he wrong. It was like a base ball game. But he's the bat and I'm the ball. Literally. But now, I see who he actually is. Even from down at the ground.

_I'm sick and tired of your attitude  
I'm feeling like I don't know you  
You tell me that that you love me then cut me down  
And I need you like a heartbeat  
But you know you got a mean streak  
Makes me run for cover when you're  
And here's to you and your temper  
Yes, I remember what you said last night  
And I know that you see what you're doing to me  
Tell me why_

His attitude drives me up the wall. Every single day. After school, when I tell him to do his homework, he talks to me in this tone that a five year old girl would use. He would say, _who are you, my mother?, _or _you can't tell me what to do. _Then he'll continue to watch TV. This would go on for about an hour. Every. Single. Day. It's like I don't even know him anymore. He used to be so studious. But now I don't know what happened. He also used to say he loved me with anything else, but now, his I love you's are conditioned. Which cuts me down even more. I needed him like a heartbeat, but all of that changed. Whenever his temper reaches its highest, all I want to do is run and hide like a child. Everything he said is still in my mind, especially what he said last night.

_You could write a book on how to ruin someone's perfect day  
Well I get so confused and frustrated  
Forget what I'm trying to say, oh_

The way that he makes other peoples day terrible is just amazing. He could actually make a book out of it. Which I highly don't recommend. This confuses me so much because he used to be so sweet. He always used bring people up, not down. This also frustrates me, because people think he's like that because of me, and I **HATE **that.

_I'm sick and tired of your reasons  
I got no one to believe in  
You tell me that you want me, then push me around  
And I need you like a heartbeat  
But you know you got a mean streak  
Makes me run for cover when you're around  
Here's to you and your temper  
Yes, I remember what you said last night  
And I know that you see what you're doing to me  
Tell me why_

With Nate, its reason after reason and that gets really tiring. I don't even think I can believe anyone anymore. He would always tell me that he would want me, and then after he does, he would make me do everything he wants me to do. And I'm saying this again, I will always run and hide when he has his tempers. None of that will change again. What ever he said last night won't change either.

_Why...do you have to make me feel small  
So you can feel whole inside  
Why...do you have to put down my dreams  
So you're the only thing on my mind_

With all the confusion that was going on I couldn't stop myself from asking him why he had to make me feel small just to make him feel like the king of the world. I also asked him why he had to crush my dreams like an egg so that he's the only thing on my mind. The only thing is that it worked. But it didn't work in a good way.

_I'm sick and tired of your attitude  
I'm feeling like I don't know you  
You tell me that you love me then cut me down  
I'm sick and tired of your reasons  
I've got no one to believe in  
You ask me for my love, the you push me around  
Here's to you and your temper  
Yes, I remember what you said last night  
And I know that you see what you're doing to me  
Tell me why_  
_Why, tell me why_

I will always get sick and tired of him. His attitude is beyond annoying, he always acts like a brat, and he always acts like a 2nd grader, which kills me inside so much.

_I take a step back; let you go  
I told you I wasn't bulletproof  
now you know_

So I ended it with him. It hurt, but it was worth it. Now he knows that I'm not as strong as he thought. But what he said last night is still ringing in my mind. It was a crucial thing to say, but I think I feel it too:

_I don't love you. _Is what he said. All I need to say is that I **don't **either.

* * *

**I don't really like this. It didn't come out the way I wanted to. So I honestly I think its crap. Review please. **

**Peyton I hope you liked it. I'm sorry if its crap. :P**

**Follow me on twitter:**

**/**** gochasekrissee no spaces ;)**

**-Kris :)**


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